Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Amnesia


I  feel like having an amnesia
My heart beats not the way it used to
I’m thinking about breathing
I am walking and counting

The flowers have died
The stars did collide
Chocolates taste ordinary
My feet, stationery

I'm wondering at wander land
Memories become like sand
Blown by the wind out of my hand
I even forgot how to stand

Sweet words are history
Our love sounds sorry
Touches come less
Generosity is at rest

Can the pieces of the good past
Recover the present, make it last?
Can the smiles of yesterday
Push this winter away


Now I understand why love is blind
With closed eyes let your heart decide
Then let your spirit coincide
And your flesh die inside







Thursday, May 10, 2012

Disbelief


The only thing that separates us from the blessings that God has already given is disbelief. Faith is the currency of heaven. It’s hard to believe that everything has already been provided but this is the truth. This is the reason why we are asked to pray with thanksgiving instead of always pleading. We praise God for He has already given all we could ever need. The supply came before the need. 

Although I have already prayed, I am threatened.  I am afraid of the debts we have incurred because of wrong decisions in the past. I am discouraged of the fact that despite of us adjusting our lifestyle, this mountain of debt seems to stay. I am disappointed of myself not being able to take control. I can’t wait to see God take us out from here. This is me. This is what I feel.

But, I now choose to look to Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of my faith. I choose not to embrace the consequences when I can tap to the grace of my Father. I say grace because we don’t deserve to be pardoned because we chose to overspend. Yet, I hold on to my God instead of being solely responsible. I used to believe that I have to pay for every mistake I have done instead of surrendering to God who can actually lift the burden from my shoulders. We repented, we learned our lesson, we ask for grace and believe for it. My confidence is in God. The goodness of God just overwhelms me. He’s like supppppeeeer good. This is the essence of Jesus being our Savior.

If I don’t have faith, I am not a Christian.